Apologizing seems to be inappropriately common among my female peers. They apologize for everything and anything.  Being too loud, being too quiet, being too skinny, being too fat, being too happy, being too sad, being too assertive, being too passive.  They even apologize for not apologizing: "Sorry not sorry."  What the heck is that?  If you're not sorry then don't apologize.

This is infuriating to me, that women are constantly apologizing for BEING THEMSELVES, and the fact that any large amount of any emotion, or experience, or response, is "too" something. It's like we expect of ourselves that we walk around like zombies with no reactions, emotions, or opinions that are too big or too little, only just right.  Perfect little Goldie Lockses.  Well guess what happens to Goldie Locks? She runs away, never to be seen again!  Why would we want that for ourselves?  Why should we blend into our surroundings and if we don't (God forbid), apologize?

Nope.  I refuse to apologize for being myself.  I will not apologize for being incredibly passionate about psychology, or feminism, or social justice, or Catholicism (yep--you read it right, I'm a big flaming CATHOLIC!), or musical theater, or fanfiction.  I will not.

I will not apologize for having opinions. I refuse to cower in the face of those who do not agree with me or do not believe that my opinions should be shared, or are too controversial, or are "not as well informed" as their's simply because they disagree.  I refuse to dampen my beliefs, and my thoughts, and my INTELLIGENCE!  I will not.

I laugh in the face of social convention which expects that I will apologize for my appearances, for not wearing make-up, or for wearing dresses everyday, or for never wearing my hair down, or for never wanting to get my ears pierced, or for not shaving my legs or plucking my eyebrows.  I will not.

I will not apologize for what I choose to put in my own body or not put in my own body.  To eat junk or eat healthy.  To have sex or to abstain.  To drink or to stay sober.  I WILL NOT!

And I refuse to apologize to anyone who believes that my asserting this philosophy or any philosophy is "too loud," or "too manly," or "too direct," or "unladylike."  I will not apologize that as an independent, strong, intelligent woman, I make you uncomfortable. I will not apologize for being confident enough in myself to label myself an independent, strong, intelligent woman. And I will not feel guilty or apologize for not apologizing.

I will not apologize because I do not owe any man, woman, person, an apology for being authentic to myself.  And I will never request, demand, or expect an apology from anyone else who is choosing to be his or her authentic self. I'm NOT SORRY that I'm NOT SORRY!

You can be not sorry you're not sorry too.  If you want to be sorry though, don't make it my, or anyone else's, problem.

Keep on thinking,
Josie